A Lemon Has Pips, A Yard Has Ships...
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aerodeth
Fortunately for Gadget, her immunity boosting supplement she took this morning finally kicked in and the illusory symptoms caused by the very infectious primordial parasite wore off quickly.
The Rat God and her portal quickly vanished... actually revealing the wide open mouth of a very large cat staring deeply entranced...and her tiny human friend was blinding walking right toward it!

"Anon, wait! Stop!"

But it was too late, the second he set foot in her mouth, Penelope closed it shut and a long hard *gulp* could be heard!

"ANON, NO!!" Gadget cried, but Penelope quickly got up and dashed off! The mouse girl did her best to chase after the cat, but Penelope was a well experienced track runner. She pretty much had to be to flee her crafty foul-smelling admirer on a regular basis!


*****************


You werent out for very long, but man was your head pounding like mad. It felt like you had a really bad hangover, but if you found out the REAL reason your head was hurting, you'd wish it was a hangover! You cringed in agony as you forced yourself up, trying to regain yourself in spite of the pain.

You begrudgingly glance around the rather odd scenery you appear to be in. It's a very pink and girly bedroom with little Vegas style neon signs, paintings of a certain blonde mouse-girl in a top hat, jazzy music playing on the radio sung in unintelligible squeaks (as if the song was sung by an actual mouse!).

It wasnt necessary to question this place because the obvious culprit was sitting there on the pretty heart-shaped bed smirking deviously your way!

“Hiya, Chips!” the Rat God sang in such an obnoxiously perky tone.

”M…my name's not Chips,” you corrected her.

“I think it's fitting,” she exclaimed, “ya know, considering your *ahem* FATE with mice and all!” Sadly, you cant quite grasp the tragic meaning by what she said (maybe read up on Charles Dickens some more, k?). Nonetheless, that didnt concern you at the moment.

“What is this place?” you question, glancing around at the bedroom scene.
“Just a temporary illusion,” the Rat God answered, “a nice relaxing placebo to take your mind off the real horror you hippity-hopped your hypnotized ass into.” Your suspicions raise.
“Where am I?!”
“In the belly of a cat.” Her buck-tooth grin couldnt possibly get any wider!

It was at that moment you realized the seriousness of the situation. The manipulative Rat God just tricked you into getting eaten alive!
Your immediate course of action was to conjure up some sort of spell to get you out, unfortunately you couldnt mentally focus your magic because the aching pain in your head prevented it. And I was wrong. Sensing that you couldnt use your magic thanks to her special 'headache' made that buck-tooth grin TEN times wider!

“GADGET!” you called out to your mouse comrade you CAN trust, “GADGET, ARE YOU THERE?! CAN YOU HEAR ME?!”
The Rat God sighed, slightly bothered but not really disappointed, “Sorry, Chips. Wrench-Girl broke out of the trance before she could join us.” Buck-tooth grin again “Aw well. Her little creepy obsessive stalker hiding in the bushes can have her!” Damn. Sounds like she's aware that Gadget has another problem to worry about. Too bad youre in no position to do something at the moment.

“Awww… you wanna help her, dont ya, Chips?” the vermin god hopped off her bed and gave you a pouty face, “ohhh, if only you could use that special magic of yours to blast a hole through this cat's tummy, and go after her! Too bad that nasty migraine's getting in the way!” You were really despising that condescending smirk of hers. “And who knows when that pain'll go away? Maybe by the time it finally does, poor little Wrench-girl could already be locked up in a crate and shipped off to a cruel animal testing lab somewhere in Wuhan, China!”

What kind of sadistic god of rats is this bitch?!

“Watch your mouth, Chips!” she suddenly sneered.
“What mouth?”
“Nevermind!” she changed the subject, “fortunately for someone as undeserving as you, I'm a kind and generous god. And with my blessing, I can not only cure you of that anti-magic migraine for good, but even give you a little energy boost to help you on your quest.”
For a price, right?
“For a price!” the Rat God mustve read your mind.

“I thought you said you didnt have an angle,” you express your distrust, “that you just wanted to see me and Gadget have a happy ending.”
“Ok, so I lied a little,” she admits, “I'm a god, I can do that. But I sincerely meant the happy ending part! And helping us BOTH out can achieve that!” Obviously, your suspicion senses were tingling (which only irritated the migraine even more) but you heard her out.
“What do you want?”

“I want to offer a deal,” the crafty cheese-eating plague spreading God of pestilence explains, “I wont go into thorough detail. Need to know, you see. But let's just say I've got a few… rival gods I wanna take care of. Theyre not as kind, loving, or fans of happy endings like I am. But I cant go up against them myself; I'll need the help of a special strong strapping sorcerer to help me out.”

Flattery didnt spark your interest. 'Rival gods' did.
“You want me to help you defeat other gods?”
“Uh huh!” she nodded, “and with our powers combined, those gods wont stand a chance and they'll be plenty of happy endings for everybody! Simply sign a pact with me and we'll be set. I get a share of your powers, you get a share of mine, badda-bing badda-boom, we're the perfect pair! Ya dig?”

She's clearly hiding something. Especially the schtick about the rival gods. But your options are kinda limited and youre running out of time.

“That's right, Chips! Youre running out of time!” the Rat God smirked, “so I'm gonna give you the illusion of choice. You can either be stubborn, sit here and rot in this cat's gut, nursing your nasty headache while leaving your precious mousy girlfriend to suffer at the hands of her archnemeses… or you can make a pact with me!" She winks. "No pressure!”
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June 2, 2023
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