The magical shrinking virus that only affects men for some reason
Everybody Likes That Little Man!
chapter 2
by
Paok
"You! Like that! LITTLE MAN!" Doctor Renee growled as she tapped the chart repeatedly. The insipid CDC diagram featured a male stick figure dwindling in size under a big cloud of cartoon viruses. "What don't you GET about it?"
"It - it just doesn't seem possible!" The man blurted out, tugging at his shirt, sweating bullets.
"The medical community doesn't know what to make of it either, despite what you may have read on Facebook." She rolled her eyes. "But it's real, and it only affects men. And only men over the age of 18. Or 16 in the UK.... Or 13 in Japan, but apparently that's an urban legend." She huffed. "For the last time, Mr. Hawthorne, don't make me repeat myself again. So pay attention. Okay? Following me?"
Her fiery stare drilled into his slack-jawed face like a stern teacher disciplining a misbehaving student.
He sputtered, unable to meet her gaze. "B-but how does it work? Where does the weight go? How does it account for the square-cube law? W-what about my brain? If that shrinks, will I retain all my memories? ..." He stumbled and muttered through his anxious questions.
"MISTER HAWTHORNE!" She boomed. "We don't know! Nobody does! This is active scientific research, so please just suspend your disbelief, okay!? Do you think the affected are asking these questions while they're trying to avoid getting crushed into paste by the nearest stiletto!?" She nearly erupted into rage, but took a moment to cool herself down, fanning herself. He squirmed in his seat, staring down at her workplace-inappropriate heels. She took a deep breath, then pointed towards a button on her shirt, which strained against her disturbingly swollen bosom, bubbling quietly with milk like a water cooler tank.
"Now. In 2 days, maybe less, you'll shrink tinier than a button on my shirt. Try to be at home from now until then. You really don't want to risk being in public when it happens. But, Mr. Hawthorne, please don't bother us after you shrink. We just can't keep an eye on every shrinker - there are just way too many cases. Oh, and there's no cure. Have a nice day!" She put on her fakest smile and ushered him out the door.
He mused sadly - when he got back home and inevitably shrank, hopefully Claire would be a bit more supportive than this doctor.